Ashleee Karen

Made it 4 months celibate…now what??

Do boots attract Betas?

Posted by ashleeekaren on October 7, 2010

First, I want to start off by saying that I am honored that Paul the King mentioned my blog.  Pretty cool.



Ok, onto my boots.

These are my Beta Magnet Boots

I always plan my outfits the night before to save myself some time in the morning – I think it’s important to look put together.  I always try to look professional, while remaining youthful and stylish.  I feel more comfortable dressed like that as opposed to having to get into some stuffy looking granny suit my Mom would wear.  I put on a nice black dress today with black tights and knee high boots and paired it with a herringbone wool jacket and a long dangley necklace.  Trendy, yet professional.  The dress was probably half an inch higher than I would normally wear, but I figured with the black tights and the high boots, the length wouldn’t be a big deal.  I double checked with a guy friend of mine and he said, no you look professional, don’t worry. (You never want to be that lawyer who walks into court and everyone is talking about you after you leave cause you dressed like a slut).

But apparently that half inch made a huge difference because I got hit on by 3 guys today.  None of them were Alphas apparently since they didn’t ask for my number.  1 guy is a bailiff in a court I go to here and there so I suspect maybe he wants to circle for awhile before he makes a move. Who knows?  Anyway, I found it interesting that they had enough balls to come up to me, but not to close.  I don’t think I was stand offish, which I can be when I’m not interested. Polite, but stand offish.  But all 3 of these guys I thought to be cute.  One of them said, “You’re gorgeous” but choked after that and couldn’t close.

Were these men Betas? Had everything I’d been reading about in all these blogs just been realized right in front of me?!

If a guy is interested in me, and he has the balls to show it, I know enough to show my appreciation for this courage and reciprocate interest. (Assuming I’m attracted to him, of course).  However, I don’t think I want to take it a step further (like I used to). I think the reciprocation is enough and a REAL man will pick up on it and try to close the deal.  Ask for my number you morons!  If I’m giving you the time of day, go ahead and ask!  Chances are, I’ll probably say yes!

Now that leads to the next query – what’s the point in giving guys my number right now if I’m trying to remain celibate for a year?  Hmmm….haven’t figured that out quite yet.  Thoughts?


5 Responses to “Do boots attract Betas?”

  1. dreamidreamed said

    Those boots are adorable!

    A guy who can’t close isn’t worth your time. Esp. when you’re wearing FMBs – hee hee!!

  2. Rivelino said

    You need to post pics of your outfits, the way Culdcept did here:

    • You need to post pics of your outfits

      I will definitely do that the next time an outfit attracts so much attention. By the time I sat down to write that post, I was already out of the outfit.

      I have been thinking of a post about fashion as I take pride in what I wear…just not sure how it would fit in with my theme… “I’m celibate – now look how cute my outfits are?”

  3. Doug1 said

    How hot are your looks on the 10 scale? You saw my 10 scale over at Paultheking’s blog.

    Is your year of celibacy project really one to try to snag an alphaish guy to commit to you? I.e. by going off sex and finally transitioning to it not being so hard after awhile, do you figure you’ll be able to hold off quick sex with a guy you eventually meet and date who really attracts you, and then rules girls like supposedly thus pull him into commitment?

    • Hmmm…how hot am I?? I think that’s a tough one to answer because you don’t want to sell yourself short, but then you don’t want to brag either… But based on your scale if you were forcing me to answer, I would say 6-7. I don’t think I’m “gorgeous” as that dude commented yesterday – I think maybe my whole vibe was just working.

      I think my year of celibacy is an attempt to be ok with being alone – not having men as distractions and giving myself more time to focus on myself. My last relationship with T—- was all about him and what he wanted and needed – I never took the time to worry about myself and that’s a real problem. Don’t get me wrong, I love being someone’s girlfriend, but I tend to over do it and always put his needs before mine. I’ve usually done this in the hope that once he sees how great I am and how much I do for him, he will be the boyfriend I want him to be. But I’ve learned over the course of the past few years that changing a man is not possible – he is always going to be who he is, and you can either love and accept him for it, or move on. I *just* read this post today by The Solomon Group and he says,

      What do you do when you see a kitten? You treat it like a kitten. What do you do when you see a wild tiger? You run like hell. Yes there’s a chance the kitten may claw your eyes out and render you blind while the tiger just wants to lick you, but Christ man, what are the odds of that shit happening? Who in their right mind would take that risk and stick around to find out?

      There are qualities about Alphas that I really like…but actually I’m not even sure I believe every guy is either an alpha or a beta. Still trying to figure that out. However, I know better now than to take someone who doesn’t want to commit and try and make him into someone who does. I can tell you I prefer a sexual alpha and a man who is an alpha in his career, but after T—-, I wouldn’t mind someone who was a beta to me – someone who wasn’t interested in manipulating me to get what they wanted. From what I’ve been reading in this sphere, Alphas are all about manipulation and psychological warfare to protect themselves and get what they want…

      So to answer your question, no I’m not try to snag an Alpha to commit to me. I don’t want to have to work that damn hard, haha.

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