Ashleee Karen

Made it 4 months celibate…now what??

Ashleee Karen – The Devirginizer and Destroyer.

Posted by ashleeekaren on October 23, 2010


Time to introduce the boy/man who started it all – S

I first met S when I was 15 working at a local restaurant during the summer.  I was about to be a sophomore in high school and he, a freshman.  He was a surfer, lean, tan, with a boyish hair cut with long bangs that swung over his eyes.

I was not (and I’m still not), a girl you’d think a surfer would date.  I had major T and A (I had B/C cups in high school – a gift and a curse) and just in general we ran with different crowds.  I was friends with some people he knew and vice versa.

That summer we started going out.  Puppy love for sure.  Then we discovered we were insanely sexually attracted to one another.  We didn’t have sex that summer, but we tried pretty much everything else.  Alas, it really was just sumer lovin and by the time the school year started, we had broken up.  

At school, we’d pretend we didn’t know each other but we’d still hook up. He’d come over after school and we’d mess around before my parents got home from work.  We’d have such a great time hanging out, making out, but the next day at school, again, we’d pretend we didn’t know each other.

My close friends knew and apparently we’d been seen around town driving together so people started to figure things out. We’d drive up to the hills and park in a secluded spot and make out literally like teenagers….

I ended up losing my virginity to someone else (for another post) but in the end, I took his.   It didn’t seem like a big deal since we never really dated after that initial summer – I always liked him and wished for more but never thought we’d end up together.  He was in the surf crowd – I played sports and was a book nerd – our high school love just wasn’t meant to be.  For some reason I think this clandestine arrangement we had did a number on my self esteem – I figured there was something wrong with me if he didn’t want people to know we liked each other.  And since there was something wrong with me, it MUST mean that he was better than me and that I should just be lucky and grateful for any attention he paid to me at all.

And so this continued for awhile – all the way up to my sophomore year in college. I was going to drive down to his college and see him but at the last minute I flaked and didn’t bother to tell him.  I never called him after that…

Flashforward to 2007 – I saw him at a bar in our hometown.  He was still boyish looking, but not boyishly handsome…still attractive though.  We were both wasted at the bar. I sat down at his table and started talking to him.  I figured after all these years, who cares about high school bullshit and whether people knew we were friends.  He asked for my card and I pretended I didn’t have one…

Flashforward to 2008 – I facebook him to say hello. He facebooks back.  What ensues is a crazy night in a hotel room screwing like we were teenagers again.  I don’t hear from him – I’m annoyed, but ok with it.

Flashforward to last week – he facebooks me again.  Wants to hook up. Proceeds to tell me that he has been sexually obsessed with me.  I ask, since when, since the last time we hooked up?? He says no, since I was 15.

“You’re still the best sex I’ve ever had.”

WOW.  Now, when I was a teenager I had a pretty bangin body so I get that he was all into that.  But then he started to remind me of all the crazy shit we used to do.

We did it in my pool a few times.

At a party I pulled him into the bathroom and blew him.

I used to tease the hell out of him and make him beg me to finish him off.

Jesus what the hell was wrong with me?!?  What kind of crazy ass teenager is that sexually confident that she’s going around doing that shit?!

Me apparently.

I guess I forgot all about this stuff until he reminded me.  And with this whole celibacy project I have, it’s interesting to revisit.

He insists that every girlfriend he’s had since me has paled in comparison sexually.  He says he is totally into the dominance thing, with the girl being dominant. It turns him on to have to beg.  I’m the first girl he ever went down on and now that’s his favorite thing to do.  He’s been jerking off to me since we were in high school – and he hasn’t stopped since (creepy or flattering?).

How is it possible, that after nearly 16 years I am still the most amazing sex he’s ever had?!  He says he thinks he’s ruined – that his sex life has been destroyed because he’s still looking for the insane, raw, sexual chemistry we had and he’s afraid he’ll never find it…Now he wants to do every dirty thing he didn’t get to do to me before…

Maybe it’s a line.  Maybe it’s true.  Maybe that’s really sad.  I was a teenager – yes, I get that I was advanced and horny as hell and apparently not much has changed, but I didn’t even have my A game out in my teens.  When we did it back in 2007, it was good and fun, but I was nervous and held back a little (translation: didn’t get drunk enough).

So anyways he wants to hook up…I haven’t exactly said no.  Actually, I’ve kinda said yes, but I’m not 100% sure I should go through with it.  I think the sex will be amazing…just not sure if it’s worth it.  Plus I kinda like the celibacy thing… not only does it give me something to blog about, but I think it was a good idea…

Maybe I’m just denying my true nature – nymphomaniac…

Thoughts???  Any advice would be appreciated…

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24 Responses to “Ashleee Karen – The Devirginizer and Destroyer.”

  1. My two cents: If you wanna have sex with him, ditch the celibacy thing and just do what you want to do. As long as there’s no bf you’ll be cheating on, there’s no reason not to hook up with a high school sweetheart.

  2. paultheking said

    Good post!

    I think you should sleep with him – don’t pass on a golden opportunity like that.

    🙂

  3. Lily said

    Will come back and post properly in regards to teenage sex etc, but..

    why did he go awol after last time?

    • For the record, I was 18 and he was 17 when we finally did it. I had lost my virginity to someone else just a few months earlier (that’s a depressing post I don’t really want to write about).

      He went AWOL because he had a girlfriend. I cheated on T with S and S cheated on his gf, J with me. That’s why I didnt get too upset when he went AWOL.

  4. dreamidreamed said

    If you really wanted to have sexy time with S, you would have already done it!

    If you break this celibacy vow, it should be for the best sex EVER. It’s like quitting a diet – do it for a white chocolate macadamia nut cheesecake, not for regular cheesecake. (And no, I’m not saying to go back to T—-. I mean someone new.)

    • This would DEFINITELY be macadamia nut cheesecake – from what I remember, these macadamia nuts were large…and the big reason (right now) I haven’t done it is because of opportunity – scheduling conflicts, etc…

      We’ve made tentative plans but I’m personally still not sure I want to do anything…

      T who!?! 😉

      • dreamidreamed said

        I’m pretty sure that in 2008 you said that sex with S was like regular cheesecake!!

      • Well he was nervous last time – we hadn’t made cheesecake in a long time… Now he’s…motivated…

        Actually we made plans bunt don’t know if it’s gonna happen. He’s so flakey..

        And DAMN you have a good memory!

  5. vodkacranberry said

    Woah.. that is a line with a whole David Hasselhof versus Paris Hilton back story to it. This guy should be in Hollywood.

    Slap him upside the head and say NO!

    Then again he’ll probably like that.. and ask you to do it again.

  6. Dream Puppy said

    Well, someone’s got to be the best. Do you want a relationship with him or just sex? If the former then seeing him is worth it, if it’s the latter I am not so sure. He said you were the best sex, but was he that great for you? Plus, what’s the point without a relationship? (forgive me I must go now, the Mayflower is waiting for me…)

    • Don’t want a relationship with him, cuz I would never be able to trust him. He definitely wasn’t the greatest sex I’ve ever had, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t turn me on…I guess I’m just wondering what it would be like now that we are older and less nervous about having sex with each other. Although apparently for him, he’s still pretty nervous since he totally flaked on me (see new post, haha).

      Anyway, is there room on the Mayflower for me…?

  7. Rivelino said

    “He says he is totally into the dominance thing, with the girl being dominant. It turns him on to have to beg.”

    Do you read Dan Savage? He talks all about this stuff.

    The only point it proves is that sex is fundamentally about dominance and submission. Well, if you are doing it right. If you are doing it wrong, it just a mechanical act.

    S was and is into being dominated sexually. He loves to beg. Maybe he loves to put on female underwear too.

    Good story.

  8. Rivelino said

    “Flashforward to 2007 – We were both wasted at the bar.”

    Classic line.

  9. Lovekraft said

    You are being fed the usual, from a guy who is throwing out a line hoping to make something stick.

    I imagine he watches porn quite regularly, so there are women out there who put your ‘skills’ to shame.

    Better still, there are women waiting around every corner he could meet who could put your imagined gift to shame, or at least in the memories category.

    Try intelligent conversation, show him you actually observe the world through his eyes, because your sexual market value only decreases.

    • I am sure that there are plenty of women out there who are better in bed than I am. I don’t doubt that for a second. I tend to re-count some stories in hyperbole. I also highly doubt that this guy is interested in my intelligent conversation so I don’t bother wasting it on him. I just thought the story was funny if there were some small chance it wasn’t a line. I am aware that there is a high probability that it was.

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